Age is a humorous factor. It creeps up on you.

“/>If you see Jim in a white Porsche in Dundee, just give him the thumbs up
When you see Jim in a white Porsche in Dundee, simply give him the thumbs up

Who can keep in mind their sixteenth birthday, twenty first birthday, fortieth? Then for these of us of a extra seasoned classic there may be the fiftieth and so forth. I’ve requested my “god”, the one which I chat to on a regular basis, if he [my god is a he] will give me good well being and life into my eighties. I really feel that if I could make it to eighty three or so, that might be fairly sufficient time on this earth. However in my early fifties, I’ve this mad craving. It’s consuming away at me. Sadly not for world peace something altruistic. No, it’s to purchase a sports activities automobile! I did say age was a humorous factor proper?

With a nasty bout of Covid-19 completed a while in the past and my first vaccination beneath my belt, there’s a want build up right into a full blown want. Maybe it was every week of mind fog, aching limbs and poor lung capability. Adopted by 5 weeks of feeling like a zombie. It has taken me nearly six weeks to get again to some type of train. And I’m at about 25 per cent capability of the place I used to be pre coronavirus. That stated, I’ve moved on now and have two gentle HIIT classes accomplished and really feel that I’m again within the sport. Maybe this new lease of life is the catalyst that has precipitated my starvation for a sports activities automobile?

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Shopping for a automobile has by no means been simpler. I imply, automobile dealerships are falling over themselves to get vehicles out the door. I can decide my automobile on-line, full some checks, purchase it and have it delivered fairly actually from wherever within the UK. Some corporations even ship it free of charge! It’s not the shopping for the automobile that’s my drawback, it’s selecting the best one. And this dilemma is spilling over into conversations inside the household.

First up, I don’t desire a sports activities automobile for ever. I solely need it for a brief spell. Let’s say a pair years, so I can wash it, polish it and drive it on quick ‘B’ roads. Hopefully by that point, the adrenaline, notion and hankering for a sports activities automobile may have been properly happy and it’ll be again to a Vauxhall Corsa for my previous age. So, shopping for this sports activities automobile seems like a selection. Both I purchase a second hand one and hope it lasts two years or I purchase a model new one utilizing PCP finance and hand it again after two years. All doable with an honest sufficient credit standing and a chunky deposit. However, there’s a catch. I don’t simply any previous sports activities automobile – I desire a Porsche.

A few of you’ll be laughing simply now, some shaking their heads and a few agreeing with my selection of sports activities automobile. I nonetheless have all my hair. In actual fact, plenty of it, so no previous bald man driving Porsche jokes please. There are many different sports activities vehicles on the market I may finance simply now. In all probability cheaper variations which have all of the devices, gizmos and acceleration that I want. However, the emotional a part of my mind the place no cause nor rationality reside in any respect is yelling at me – Porsche! Porsche! Porsche! And plenty of of you’ll know precisely how that feels. It might stem from the addictive a part of my cognitive make-up – my shut encounters with neurotransmitters that search and luxuriate in pleasure. Thoughts you these mind chemical substances don’t absolutely perceive and recognize the price of the Porsche and the social baggage, stereotyping and outright sneering I’ll endure as I parade it alongside the promenade in Dundee.

The financials don’t add up in any respect for any maths instructor price her salt. Primarily, I spend about £30,000 over two years then hand again my Porsche to the dealership. So long as it’s in good situation, the mileage is beneath 10,000 miles a 12 months and I’m prepared to resist the gross sales barrage to purchase one other one, I can kiss it goodbye. Together with all that money! However, even that stark headline in my mind – ‘Dundee man looses £30k in River Tay Porsche escapade” just isn’t sufficient to dissuade me from my journey into the land of the Porsche dealership. Nearer examination by any rational individual would set up that I’m maybe trapped in an age associated obsession. And there’s no going again – I’ve to scratch this itch.

Think about! A good looking white Porche 911 automated with 21 inch wheels and appears that make George Clooney look previous his finest. Inside it has extra options that Elon Musk’s Area X mission management centre. When the engine roars into motion, my neighbours shake their heads and gossip to one another utilizing phrases corresponding to “tosser”, “tube” and “bampot”. Then I put it into drive mode and off we go into the potholes, pace digital camera traps and Porsche hating Audi drivers, whose vehicles are simply as quick and they’re will to point out me. Ooft!

Sure, age is a humorous previous factor. Why would a reasonably rational individual with restricted funds and a household to assist need to trigger all of it misery in an effort to fulfil some latent age pushed want? I don’t have the reply to this one. All I can admit to is scrolling Autotrader on-line for hours narrowing down a Porsche that I fancy. Once in a while concern grips me, shakes me and pulls me again to being 53 and dumb. However, the urge to splash out on a sports activities automobile remains to be there each morning.

I simply have one ask. When you some previous bloke driving a white Porsche 911 across the streets of Dundee, considering he’s a “cool dude’, simply smile, give him the thumbs up and nod your head approvingly. That can make my day…..